Thursday, May 24, 2012

A Controversy Makes For Exciting Blogging Material(An accidental double post)

Today, while I was doing my daily facebook stalking, I was reading a friend's status update. It was about gay marriage. The chain of comments that followed were also about gay marriage. And more specifically about how 'stupid' and 'ignorant' and 'hateful' and 'ugly' the people who oppose gay marriage are. For WEEKS now, this subject has been bothering me, but I haven't said anything about it yet so now my thoughts have built to this point where my they are a bit too lengthy to fit in a status update. Thus, I blog. I thought I'd use the few thoughts that I used for my status update as a starting point and we'd go from there. 

I'm glad that I have such a diverse group of friends and that you all have strong opinions and are willing to share them. HOWEVER; hating people who hate gay people (WRONG though they may be) is hypocritical. Hating people who are against gay marriage, but who DON'T necessarily hate gay people (no, those two life views are not synonymous) is worse than hypocritical. It's ugly. It's mean. And you are wrong to do it. Spouting hate in ANY direction is wrong. If you believe in gay marriage, good for you...defend it. But leave those of us who defend traditional marriage alone to do as we believe is right.

For the record, I am against gay marriage. I believe in the sanctification of marriage for both religious and social reasons. Mostly, I believe that the term 'marriage' is defined as being a union between a man and a woman and that when a gay or lesbian desire to be joined, they are entering into a different kind of agreement. They can't be entering into a marriage because marriage is not defined as a union of two people who love each other. If two people who love each other and just happen to be two females or two males desire to be joined together contractually and spend the rest of their lives together, that is just just has to be called something different because it is a different kind of union. 

This is not a position of hate. It is not a position of ignorance. I have no fear of or hatred towards homosexuals. Some of my favorite people in the world just happen to be gay. I have no desire to keep gay people apart. I have no agenda to 'eradicate' them from society. I am a live and let live kinda gal. Your choices are your choices. HOWEVER, when you start trying to legally change the definition of something that has the potential to directly affect me and my ability to choose, I have to stand up against it. 

I don't want to go into any more detail about my beliefs about gay marriage than I already have. That's not what this post is about...if you have more questions, please feel free to ask me. I'm always up for a discussion about it. 
The point of this entry, however, is this: disagreeing with me is one thing; you are entitled to your opinion; BULLYING me, berating me, hating me, or verbally assaulting me because of my beliefs is a different thing entirely. It is completely hypocritical, morally objectionable, inappropriate and just plain rude. Just because someone thinks differently than you, doesn't mean you have the right to be condescending or judgmental. Isn't that one of the reasons you get so annoyed with the 'Christians' who spout off horrible comments about gays? Aren't you exuding the VERY BEHAVIOR you are seeking to abolish? 

You are allowed to express your opinion and I'm allowed to express mine. But can't we do so lovingly, understandingly and with regard to everyone's right to believe as they choose? I don't deserve to be called a bigot or hateful or any of the other things I just read in those comments. You don't know me. You don't know what I believe. You don't try to understand it or see where I'm coming just label me and put me in a category because of something I believe in. 


Just stop it. 


  1. There is NO way to say it better. GOOOOOOOOOD Job!!!!!!!! I MAY have to copy much of what you said verbatim!

  2. Hey Beanie, it's Sarah. (I'm at work and stalking your blog cus I'm bored and you're forever interesting.) (That wasn't sarcasm, you are lol.) I have no idea if the status you were talking about was on my fb (cus honestly I don't even remember the last time gay marriage has come up on my fb lol), but even if it wasn't it certainly is something that has come up alot. And basically, I am in complete agreeance with you. Obviously not on the gay marriage part- surprise surprise I'm supportive of it- but that it's completely hypocritical for someone to accuse one side of hate and then hate that other side. I DO think alot of people are against gay marriage because they are homophobic and hateful, but that's certainly not all people and it's certainly not you. And hating someone ever is stupid. The point of love is, well, love. No one's going to agree on everything so just agree to disagree, but screaming that people are hateful just continues on the endless 'war', because both sides scream the other side is full of hate and it seems they're full of hate in the first place cus the other side hates them AND IT NEVER ENDS.

    Anyway, so I really hope that status wasn't mine, but even if it wasn't I'm sure it'll come up on my fb again. And alot of people will probably comment and yell about homophobics and hate and etc, but for whatever it's worth I don't believe that.

    And I love you. So there :)